i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Randomize