I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
