it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
