THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize