You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
