Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I think my nap took me to another dimension
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Randomize
