would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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