Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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