her vagine was all disorganized.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Randomize
