The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Randomize
