We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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