So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize