Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
