Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
