Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
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