so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
