lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
