and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
