The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I know her cup size but not her name....
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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