Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I should be sponsored by Trojan
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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