Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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