my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
