You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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