how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
