I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
