So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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