i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
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She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
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WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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