even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
