in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize