i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize