You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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