sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Are my feet made of real feet?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize