So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
My bed smells like the plague
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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