i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I stole a fireplace last night.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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