wat bout pragnant strippers??
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
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