Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
