god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Randomize
