it hurts more in the daytime
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize