We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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