My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
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