that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
so much tequila, so little girl.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
