and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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