My room smells like vodka and shame
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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