But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
