My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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