my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
