remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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