It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
