Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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