Already got asked if we're dating
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize