I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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